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The Structural Engineer's Dream

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The following poem appeared in the March '99 issue of the SEAoT North
Central Texas Chapter Newsletter.  It was subtitled: "Why I Gave Up
Buildings for Bridges".  This prose was written many years ago by Pat W.
Clark, P.E., a veteran structural engineer in Houston, Texas.  I hope that
you enjoy reading it as much as I did!

Stan R. Caldwell, P.E.
Dallas, Texas


In the land of the hereafter
when they cut my shackles free,
In the land of milk and honey
that is where I long to be.

For there'll be no skewed connections
and, in answer to my dreams,
There'll be no silly plumbers
putting drain pipes through my beams.

Oh, there'll be no electricians
running conduits here and there
With no regard to rebar
and the cover I can't spare.

And there'll be no M.E.s present
with their cotton picking lies
'Bout leaving them eight inches
for a duct three feet in size.

No, there'll be no stubborn clients
with accents deep and solemn,
Insisting on a offset
in my main supporting column.

Everything will be straight forward
all my structures will be plumb,
I won't have to drown my sorrows
in orange juice laced with rum.

Yes, I know this promised Eden
will be free of all defects,
And throughout its farthest reaches,
there will be no architects.