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Humor for today

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Attention  SEAINT.org  List members:


YOU MUST READ THIS.  IT IS JUST TOO FUNNY. 


Subject: You don't want this guy's job

Possibly the funniest story in a long while, this is a bricklayer's accident
report, which was printed in the newsletter of the Australian equivalent
of the Workers' Compensation board.

This is a true story. Had this guy died, he'd have received a Darwin
Award for sure....

Dear Sir, "I am writing in response to your request for 
additional information in Block 3 of the accident report form. I put "poor
planning" as the cause of my accident. You asked for a fuller explanation and 
I
trust the following details will be sufficient.

I am a bricklayer by trade. On the day of the accident, I was working
alone on the roof of a new six-story building. When I completed my work, 
I found that I had some bricks left over which, when weighed later were 
found to be slightly in excess of 500 lbs.  Rather than carry the bricks down 
by hand, I decided to lower them in a barrel by using a pulley, which was
attached to the side of the building on the sixth floor. Securing the rope at
ground level, I went up to the roof, swung the barrel out and loaded the
bricks into it. Then I went down and untied the rope, holding it tightly 
to ensure a slow descent of the bricks. 

You will note in Block 11 of the accident report form that I weigh 135lbs.
Due to my surprise at being jerked off the ground so suddenly, I lost my 
presence of mind and forgot to let go of the rope. Needless to say, I
proceeded at a rapid rate up the side of  the building. In the vicinity of 
the 
third floor, I met the barrel which was now proceeding downward at an 
equal, impressive speed. This explained the fractured skull, minor abrasions 
and the broken collar bone, as listed in section 3 of the accident report 
form. 

Slowed only slightly, I continued my rapid ascent, not stopping until the 
fingers 
of my right hand were two knuckles deep into the pulley. Fortunately by this 
time I had regained my presence of mind and was able to hold tightly to the 
rope, 
in spite of beginning to experience dizziness. At approximately the same 
time, 
however, the barrel of bricks hit the ground and the bottom fell out of the 
barrel.

Now devoid of the weight of the bricks, that barrel weighed approximately
50lbs. I refer you again to my weight. As you can imagine, I began a
rapid descent, down the side of the building. In the vicinity of the third
floor, I met the barrel coming up. This accounts for the two fractured ankles,
broken tooth and several lacerations of my legs and lower body. 

Here my luck began to change slightly. The encounter with the barrel seemed to
slow me enough to lessen my injuries when I fell into the pile of bricks 
and fortunately only three vertebrae were cracked. I am sorry to 
report, however, as I lay there on the pile of bricks, in pain, unable to 
move,
I again lost my composure and presence of mind and let go of the rope
and I lay there watching the empty barrel begin its journey back down 
onto me.

This explains the two broken legs.  I hope this answers your inquiry."

==================================================

Additional 


What stupidity have you  experience at the construction site?

I had a job where a  mason took  his morning coffee  break inside a material  
hoist!   HUH??     Yes the laborer dangled his legs into the open shaft of a 
temporary  elevator shaft.  Needless to say  when the elevator  went by it 
was good-bye legs.  The explanation was quit simple  -  It was break time  
and no one should be working  including the elevator operator,  so what 
better placed to put your legs then into an elevator shaft.

The laborer sued  everyone connected  with the job.  I believe  the general 
contractor and hoist contractor eventually settled the case for MILLIONS  of 
dollars!!

====================

Bob  Johnson  






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