# Re: Valentines Day Mathematics

• To: <TheForminos(--nospam--at)cs.com>, "McTomney, Bill" <BMCTOMNEY(--nospam--at)ci.santa-barbara.ca.us>, "Jerry Acker" <jpacker(--nospam--at)earthlink.net>, "Greg & Ann Vaka" <gvaka(--nospam--at)prodigy.net>, "Aggie Etchebarren" <aggieetch(--nospam--at)aol.com>, <seaint(--nospam--at)seaint.org>
• Subject: Re: Valentines Day Mathematics
• Date: Wed, 13 Feb 2002 14:30:34 -0800
```----- Original Message -----
From: "Caldwell, Stan" <scaldwell(--nospam--at)halff.com>
To: "'SEAINT Listserv'" <seaint(--nospam--at)seaint.org>
Sent: Tuesday, February 12, 2002 9:13 AM
Subject: Valentines Day Mathematics

> ROMANCE MATHEMATICS
>
> Smart man + smart woman = romance
> Smart man + dumb woman = affair
> Dumb man + smart woman = marriage
> Dumb man + dumb woman = pregnancy
>
> SHOPPING MATH
>
> A man will pay \$2 for a \$1 item he needs.
> A woman will pay \$1 for a \$2 item that she doesn't need.
>
> GENERAL EQUATIONS & STATISTICS
>
> A woman worries about the future until she gets a husband.
> A man never worries about the future until he gets a wife.
> A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend.
> A successful woman is one who can find such a man.
>
> HAPPINESS
>
> To be happy with a man, you must understand him a lot and love him a
little.
> To be happy with a woman, you must love her a lot and not try to
understand
> her at all.
>
> LONGEVITY
>
> Married men live longer than single men, but married men are a lot more
> willing to die.
>
> MEMORY
>
> A married man should forget his mistakes, there's no use in two people
> remembering the same thing.
>
> APPEARANCE
>
> Men wake up as good-looking as they went to bed.
> Women somehow deteriorate during the night.
>
> PROPENSITY TO CHANGE
>
> A woman marries a man expecting he will change, but he doesn't.
> A man marries a woman expecting that she won't change, but she does.
>
> DISCUSSION TECHNIQUE
>
> A woman has the last word in any argument.  Anything a man says after that
> is the beginning of a new argument.
>
> COMPREHENSION
>
> There are 2 times when a man doesn't understand a woman - before marriage
> and after marriage.
>
> HOW TO STOP PEOPLE FROM BUGGING YOU ABOUT GETTING MARRIED:
>
> Old relatives used to come up to a friend of mine at weddings, poking him
in
> the ribs and telling him, "You're next."  They stopped after he started
> doing the same thing to them at funerals.
>
>
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